Unforgettable

People don't remember me.

It sounds like an insecurity complex, but I swear that it's true. One example (of many): the wife of a former colleague of my husband's spent two evenings sitting across from me at a restaurant, conversed with me at an office party and even invited me to her wedding. My husband and I later attended a party at her home, and when I saw her I walked right up and said, "Thanks so much for inviting us!"

She smiled, held out her hand and said, "Hi, I'm Tahnee. What's your name?"

My neighbor -- a really lovely woman -- and I were talking the other day, and she mentioned that she suffers from the same forget-ability. It's hard for me to understand how anyone could forget her, and I don't think I'm flattering myself when I say that she seemed surprised that people would forget me. But it's true. It happens more often than I'd like.

Not that I let it get to me, not too much, anyway. I really think it's Tahnee's loss that she can't remember the very nice conversations we shared. But I'll admit that her indifference made me loathe to spend any more time with her and her husband.

Now, imagine how your donor feels when you misspell her name…when you reference a gift amount he never gave…when you call, email or send mail when he expressly asked you not to…when you show that you have no idea who they are or why they gave to you in the first place.

Frankly, it's insulting. And no one wants to spend time or money with someone who insults them.

Know your donors. Show them that you know who they are, that you understand why they give and that you share their passion for solving the problem your organization is trying to solve. Let them know that you rely on and appreciate their commitment to your cause.

Never let them feel forgettable.

How are you making your donors feel like you know who they are? How do you show them they're valued? Share your ideas in the comment section!

Is Your Board Engaged?

One of the most common refrains I hear from my friends and colleagues in the nonprofit arena is "I'm just not sure how to make my Board understand fundraising!" One executive director friend dreads his quarterly report to his Board -- not because his organization isn't meeting its fundraising goals, but because he feels like his Board holds him to impossibly high standards and is always disappointed. I think every nonprofit should endeavor to recruit at least one fundraising professional onto their Board. Having that insider who can bridge the gap between the staff and the Board is so beneficial to both groups that I've always been surprised it isn't standard practice.

But until that happens, there are several key ways you can engage your Board in fundraising and help them understand how to strengthen your organization and its fundraising efforts.

First, you need to understand where your Board Members are coming from. Who are they? What is their background? Why are they involved with your organization? What activities spark their interests and passion? What stories do they tell about their involvement with your nonprofit? Understanding your audience is key to persuading people to give to your organization, and it's key to persuading your Board members to engage, as well.

Once you understand broadly and deeply who your Board is, then you can start to use their language, tap into their concerns and hopes, and create a culture of fundraising throughout your organization.

Cultivate that culture is by communicating openly and often with your Board members.

• Use Storytelling to tell them about the impact they're having in your community.
• Set clear expectations -- in other words, tell them what needs to be done and give them the tools to do that work.
• Set aside time for one-on-one meetings with Board Members, and use that time to listen to their stories. Ask them what first excited them about your organization, and what their goals are for the next year.
• Thank them often -- and personally -- for their commitment and participation. And ask them to personally thank your donors. This circle of gratitude makes everyone feel valued, needed and appreciated -- and makes your mission possible.

I also love this handy info-graphic on increasing Board engagement, which outlines practical, achievable steps for both smaller and larger nonprofit organizations.

Above all, it's critical to remember that you're all on the same side. You may come at the problem you're trying to solve from different perspectives -- and that's great because it means you'll cover all the bases -- but you are all working for a common goal: the mission of your organization.

I do not think that means what you think it means

Earlier this year, my friend and colleague Amy Blake posted a fantastic musing about storytelling and her concern that it has evolved (or devolved) from a valuable tool in the fundraiser's toolbox to a meaningless buzzword-du-jour. As I've  made my year-end rounds, I've noticed that it's not just storytelling that's getting the magic bullet treatment. As I've mentioned before, right now is a fantastic time to be a fundraiser. There's so much information out there. But be careful when you're implementing all that free advice because there are nuances to using story-telling, donor-centricity, compelling emotion and all the other keys to great fundraising. And those nuances could mean the difference between a blockbuster campaign and a dud.

Being donor-centric doesn't mean putting yourself in your donor's shoes.

Because you can't. You know too much, you've taken the red pill (The blue one? I can't remember.), you're in too deep. You're already sold on the issues you care about, and it's really hard to be objective enough to take a step back and understand how those issues appear to your donor.

Instead, try to remember the last time you tried to learn something new. How did it feel to not know anything about a subject? What key pieces of information did you need to help you understand the subject and what was required of you? What kind of encouragement did you need? What spurred you on to learn more?

Even the most devoted donors are not as well versed in your issues as you are. Being donor-centric means understanding what your donor needs -- emotionally and intellectually -- to spur them to give.

Storytelling is not a magic bullet.

I'll tell you a secret: storytelling will not singlehandedly save your fundraising.

Donors do not read stories and automatically open their wallets. In fact, stories without context not only don't help you fundraise, they actively hurt your fundraising efforts. And sometimes, even stories with context don't work in fundraising -- if they're not the stories your donor wants to hear.

One of my clients launched a big storytelling push last year. It bombed. In reviewing what went wrong, we realized we weren't telling the donors the stories they wanted to hear. We were telling them the stories we wanted to tell. The difference cost the organization a lot of money.

Guess what? How your donor helps your cause IS a story. Two lines of copy addressing what's at stake IS a story. And often it's those stories-that-don't-look-like-stories that are the most effective in fundraising.

You need the right kind of emotion.

One of the biggest mistakes I see with organizations is confusing pathos for emotion. I feel sorry for a great many people and sad about a great many situations in this world. But I don't -- I can't -- fix them all. Emotion is no good to a fundraiser if it doesn't move a donor to act.

Anger is a prime motivator to action. Outrage makes us jump out of our chairs and get things done. Positive emotions like hope and gratitude are also super-motivators. Pathos, sympathy and sorrow might push people to act, but they're far more likely to  make donors feel overwhelmed or depressed.

One of my favorite things that Tom Ahern says about fundraisers is that it's our job to "deliver joy." There's no joy in a sad story if it doesn't make the donor feel like he or she can do something to alleviate the sadness.

Get that information -- and go deep

The volume of information we have and our almost-instantaneous ability to get it can sometimes encourage a broad but shallow understanding. But our fundraising can be so much more effective if we deepen our knowledge. Track what moves your donors, continue to refine that knowledge through tests, and listen to what your donors say about your organization, your cause, and the other things that interest them.

In the end, it is your donors -- not experts like me! -- who will tell you how best to fundraise.

Always Say Yes

One of the most valuable lessons of my professional life was first delivered to me in my high school improv class: Always Say Yes. If you've ever taken an improv class -- or read the chapter in Tina Fey's memoir that talks about her application of "Always Say Yes" into her own work life -- then you know that this rule is designed to keep an improv scene going. Actors are not allowed to say "no" to their scene-mates, or the entire scene dies. As Fey says, "The fun is always on the other side of a yes."

I was reminded of this lesson from my long-ago improv class right out of college, when I worked for someone who routinely demanded the impossible. Very quickly, I realized that as long as I greeted his every new proposal with a "yes," then work moved forward relatively peacefully.

Of course, that didn't mean that his every proposal worked. In fact, many, many times, it fell flat. And eventually, I learned how to avoid his crazier demands by saying "yes"...and then telling him exactly what needed to happen in order to accomplish his request.

To this day, I say "yes" to almost every unreasonable demand that crosses my desk -- not out of a misguided sense of people-pleasing, or a secret masochistic streak. But because I know saying "yes" is the quickest way to get to the fun, to the part of a project where the words are flowing, the creativity is happening and things are getting done.

I am always taken aback when I work with someone who tells me "no." How can you ever get to the good stuff if you refuse to even try?

Sure, it might not work. I've pitched many an idea that did not work -- either because they were under-developed, or because I didn't understand something crucial about the project, or because they just ultimately weren't doable.

But those failed efforts almost always led me to successes. And, perhaps more importantly, they taught me to take a joy in my work that I could never have found if I'd let myself say "no."

What Knitting Taught Me About Writing

I started knitting when I was in my mid-20’s. My mother is an expert seamstress and had tried to teach me to sew, but it just never took. I couldn’t muster the patience or the exactitude necessary for sewing. (Really, I hated all the ironing. I still don’t iron, unless you count tossing things in the dryer for a few minutes.) By a strange coincidence, I also started writing for a living in my mid-twenties, about four months after I cast on my first stitch.

For years, I didn’t think the two were related at all, except that when I am in a knitting phase, I’m not writing quite as much, and when I’m in a writing phase, I’m not knitting as much. If I thought of them together at all, they were competitors for my time.

But one day, one of my kids was looking at my latest project, and she said, “Wow, that sure is a mess. Are you sure you want to keep making it?”

Hold the mustard! That is something I say to myself in the middle of every single thing I write -- fiction or fundraising or email to a friend.  And in that moment, I realized that all these years of knitting and writing have been far more inextricably linked than I ever knew.

The Beginning: Casting on

Every piece of knitting starts with that first cast-on stitch (Fancy expert knitters who know some fabulous technique for starting without casting on: Pipe down! I’m making a point here!), just as every piece you write starts with that first word.

Those first few rows of knitting – just like the first few sentences you write – are maddening. Full of promise of what’s to come, but messy and often confusing...and absolutely necessary to get to the good stuff. They’re never the prettiest stitches or the most beautiful prose. But they form the foundation for what is to come.

As you add row upon row, word upon word, you feel pretty good. You’re making progress! Your fingers are flying! This is AWESOME!

Until you look at your word (or row) count and realize how much further you have to go.

The Messy Middle

Which is when you get to the big slog, which looks like this:

Can you even imagine wearing that? Can you imagine wanting to?

The same thing happens when I’m writing. I get to the middle and feel absolutely certain that everything I’ve done up to that point was a complete waste of time. There are stray thoughts everywhere, paragraphs that start strong, then peter out into nothing. Structure? What structure! It’s an amorphous blob that will never amount to anything.

But I keep plugging away. Because I’ve come this far, and because I’ve done this enough times to trust that it will somehow, some way, work out.

Done, But Not Done

And then you finish. You type that last word, cast off that last stitch. It feels great, and hey! It doesn’t look half bad.

Of course, it’s not ready for prime time yet. There are all those loose plot threads to tie up and those seams – and themes – to sew up.

And this is where I really start to lose heart. I’ve spent so much time with this project – during which I’ve thought of a dozen other projects (or received a dozen new assignments) I’d rather be working on. And I’ve kind of gotten sick of even looking at this one. Why did I pick out this ugly yarn anyway? No way am I ever going to wear this monstrosity!

I know a lot of knitters – and writers – who get to this stage and simply stop. They have completed but not finished sweaters taking up space in their knitting bags. Writers have finished but not polished novels. Fundraisers have letters that could have raised big money, but instead fall flat.

But this is what knitting – such a visual and tactile medium – has taught me about the more intellectual medium of writing: DON’T GIVE UP.

That extra little effort to finish and polish and press is so worth it.

Where Space Exploration and Fundraising Collide

Like many people the world over, I was thrilled to see that the Curiosity Rover landed successfully on Mars this week. I showed my kids the first pictures and answered their questions about space exploration. (I think my 5-year-old's mind was officially blown by the news that a ROBOT took that picture!) But even as my kids were getting more and more excited about space exploration, I saw the tweets racing by lamenting the money spent on sending a rover to Mars when there are so many problems here on Earth we need to solve.

I'm not going to write a comprehensive defense of space exploration. If you wonder what the value is, check out this interview with Neil deGrasse Tyson, or read his newest book. But I will say that many of the things you and I use every day -- everything from our cell phones and computers, to athletic wear and tennis shoes -- were originally developed for NASA.

Imagine what might be achievable if NASA had reliable funding and the freedom to aim for truly audacious goals. What alternative fuels or advances in solar power technology might be made? What cool new fabric might make sweaty summer runs like the one I took this morning even more comfortable?

A lot of fundraising departments I work with are just as starved for funding as NASA. In an effort to be efficient and streamlined -- to put as many of those dollars they raise toward programs as possible -- too many nonprofits are denying themselves a chance to innovate, evolve and, ultimately, do even more to further their missions.

Instead of aiming for the big and complex mission to Mars, they're content to run the same near-Earth orbit mission over and over again.

It's easy to play it safe. After all, nobody wants to be the one who bets big and loses. But your donors can tell the difference between an organization that's hanging on to the status quo and one that's charting a bold and energetic course for the future. Guess which one most of them prefer?

Investing in your fundraising efforts -- whether it's in increased time, money, energy or vision -- can pay huge dividends.

Test boldly in your direct mail, and you can find out what appeals to your donors and target your fundraising more effectively. No more incremental nudges. Let's find out what happens when you take an entirely different creative approach, or aim for a new universe, or aggressively go after lapsed donors.

Take the time to coordinate communications and fundraising department efforts, and you can pool talents and develop strong messaging that helps inform and enlighten people about your efforts. (Bonus: unless you have to bribe them with donuts to sit in a room together, this won't cost you a cent!)

Spend a little more on personalization -- in the mail, on the Web and in your face-to-face efforts -- and you can foster better relationships with your donors...and reap the benefit of increased giving.

And another bonus of investing in your fundraising is that in doing so, you might just find other ways to cut costs that don't stymie innovation.

I'm excited to see the pictures and read about the discoveries that Curiosity sends back to Earth. It's a remarkable achievement.

But I also get really excited when I work with an organization that is committed to exploring all the ways they can improve their fundraising. Be bold. Be daring. Dream big. Show your donors how much passion you have for your mission, and watch as they reward you with their loyal support.

Passionate Persuasion

"Passionate people are the only advocates which always persuade. The simplest man with passion will be more persuasive than the most eloquent without."

~Francois de La Rochefoucauld

When I interviewed the executive director of an environmental organization recently, he was extremely eager to give me statistics about Congressional budgeting as it relates to the environment and to talk about specific legislation winding its way through Congress – down to the subcommittees and staffers involved. I think we can all agree that only the most wonky among us have that level of interest in environmental legislation.

So I asked him why he cared so much. There must be a reason he was willing to delve so deeply into the minutiae of the legislative process on this one issue, right? It took him a few minutes to shift gears, but once he did, he talked about what prompted him to become an environmentalist, his outrage at what he sees as the immoral way government is spending taxpayer money, and his fears for the future of humanity if we ignore Global Warming.

In just a few minutes, we went from a dry fact piece about Congressional spending on the environment, to a Control-tying acquisition letter based on an impassioned plea for moral and humane fiscal decisions.

It’s easy to get caught up in the facts about what you’re doing – and for a lot of people working in nonprofits, people who face desperate circumstances every day as a part of their job, it’s an important method of self-preservation. But when you’re trying to get people to support your mission, you have to be able to recreate that initial surge of passion. Because all the facts in the world won’t get you as much support as one good, emotion-driven story.

This is where that old writing rule “Show, Don’t Tell” comes in.

Need an Example?

It’s easy to tell your story like this: “Every week we see more than 50 homeless, often ill, dogs come into our shelter. And tragically, fewer than 20% of those are adopted. As our canine population grows, our needs grow, too, and today, we’re facing a crisis situation. We urgently need an infusion of $XX to house, feed and care for the dogs we currently have and those we expect in the next few weeks.”

You’ve got the numbers, it’s pretty emotional, and your core group of donors will probably respond.

But consider this approach: “Zoe cowered in the back of her dog carrier, shaking. I looked at her check-in sheet: She’d been abused in her previous home, and she suffered from malnutrition and a bad case of fleas. I got down on the floor, my eyes fixed on her big brown beauties, and coaxed her forward. It took a while, but eventually, she scooted out of her carrier, calmed her shaking, and placed her head trustingly in my lap. One small triumph…that will be replayed more than 50 times this week. You can help Zoe – and all the dogs of XX shelter – make this challenging transition…”

Who can resist a pitch like that? By painting the picture of one dog the shelter has helped, you give your donor the chance to feel like they are there with you. What’s more, this approach breaks down an overwhelming problem – 50 dogs a week that need homes – into a small, do-able task. They may not be able to help every dog that needs them, but they can help this ONE dog.

Very few people dive into the nonprofit world without having some passion. So don't forget why you chose nonprofit work in the first place. Communicate that in your fundraising, and you'll find others flocking to your organization as well.